a publication spurious in the eyes of Miss Gates, our teacher.
Why she frowned when a child recited from The Grit Paper I never knew, but in some way it was associated with liking fiddling,
eating syrupy biscuits for lunch, being a holy-roller, singing Sweetly Sings the Donkey and pronouncing it dunkey,
all of which the state paid teachers to discourage. Even so, not many of the children knew what a Current Event was.
Little Chuck Little, a hundred years old in his knowledge of cows and their habits, was halfway through an Uncle Natchell story
when Miss Gates stopped him:Charles, that is not a current event. That is an advertisement.
Cecil Jacobs knew what one was, though. When his turn came, he went to the front of the room and began, “Old Hitler—”
“Adolf Hitler, Cecil,” said Miss Gates. “One never begins with Old anybody.”
“Yes ma’am,” he said. “Old Adolf Hitler has been prosecutin’ the—” “Persecuting Cecil…”
“Nome, Miss Gates, it says here—well anyway, old Adolf Hitler has been after the Jews and he’s puttin’ ’em in prisons
and he’s taking away all their property and he won’t let any of ‘em out of the country and he’s washin’ all the feeble-minded and—”
Washing the feeble-minded?” “Yes ma’am, Miss Gates, I reckon they don’t have sense enough to wash themselves,
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