He looked like he was dressed for a colonial occupation of Panama, not a funeral.
The minister said, “Let us pray,” but as everyone else bowed their head, I could only stare slack-jawed at the sight of Peter Van Houten.
After a moment, he whispered, “We gotta fake pray,” and bowed his head.
I tried to forget about him and just pray for Augustus. I made a point of listening to the minister and not looking back.
The minister called up Isaac, who was much more serious than he’d been at the prefuneral.
Augustus Waters was the Mayor of the Secret City of Cancervania, and he is not replaceable,Isaac began.
Other people will be able to tell you funny stories about Gus, because he was a funny guy,
but let me tell you a serious one: A day after I got my eye cut out, Gus showed up at the hospital.
I was blind and heartbroken and didn’t want to do anything and Gus burst into my room and shouted, ‘I have wonderful news!’
And I was like, ‘I don’t really want to hear wonderful news right now,’ and Gus said,
‘This is wonderful news you want to hear,’ and I asked him, ‘Fine, what is it?’
and he said, ‘You are going to live a good and long life filled with great and terrible moments that you cannot even imagine yet!’”
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