“He's clever at his business,” Matilda said. “Clever my foot!” the Trunchbull shouted.
“Miss Honey tells me that you are meant to be clever, too! Well madam, I don't like clever people! They are all crooked!”
“You are most certainly crooked! Before I fell out with your father, he told me some very nasty stories about the way you behaved at home!”
But you'd better not try anything in this school, young lady. I shall be keeping a very careful eye on you from now on. Sit down and keep quiet.”
The First Miracle
Matilda sat down again at her desk. The Trunchbull seated herself behind the teacher's table.
It was the first time she had sat down during the lesson. Then she reached out a hand and took hold of her water-jug.
Still holding the jug by the handle but not lifting it yet, she said, “I have never been able to understand why small children are so disgusting.”
“They are the bane of my life. They are like insects. They should be got rid of as early as possible.”
We get rid of flies with fly-spray and by hanging up fly-paper. I have often thought of inventing a spray for getting rid of small children.”
How splendid it would be to walk into this classroom with a gigantic spray-gun in my hands and start pumping it.”
Or better still, some huge strips of sticky paper.”
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