You try, and you fail, and your world collapses around you, burns down to ashes.
That said, I did sometimes wonder what it would be like to have someone —a cousin, say, or a sibling—
to call on in times of need, or even just to spend unplanned time with.
Someone who knows you, cares about you, who wants the best for you.
A houseplant, however attractive and robust, doesn’t quite cut the mustard, unfortunately.
Pointless even to speculate, though. I had no one, and it was futile to wish it were otherwise.
After all, it was no more than I deserved. And, really, I was fine, fine, fine.
Was I not here, after all, out in the world, and going to a party?
Dressed in my finery and awaiting an acquaintance? Look out, Saturday night, here comes Eleanor Oliphant!
I allowed myself a little smile. In the end, my mood soured somewhat, as I had to wait ten minutes for Raymond.
I find lateness exceptionally rude; it’s so disrespectful, implying unambiguously that you consider yourself
and your own time to be so much more valuable than the other person’s.
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