As Mayhem and Jacks, Isaac and I felt our way forward in the cavern until we bumped into a guy whom we stabbed
after getting him to tell us that we were in a Ukrainian prison cave, more than a mile beneath the ground.
As we continued, sound effects—a raging underground river, voices speaking in Ukrainian and accented English—
led you through the cave, but there was nothing to see in this game.
After playing for an hour, we began to hear the cries of a desperate prisoner, pleading, “God, help me. God, help me.”
“Pause,” Isaac said. “This is when Gus always insists on finding the prisoner,
even though that keeps you from winning the game, and the only way to actually free the prisoner is to win the game.”
“Yeah, he takes video games too seriously,” I said. “He’s a bit too enamored with metaphor.”
“Do you like him?” Isaac asked. “Of course I like him. He’s great.”
“But you don’t want to hook up with him?” I shrugged. “It’s complicated.”
“I know what you’re trying to do. You don’t want to give him something he can’t handle.
You don’t want him to Monica you,” he said. “Kinda,” I said. But it wasn’t that.
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